Em with a fever

Luke 1:49--"For he that is mighty hath done to me great things; and holy is his name."

Even in the shadow of illnesses there are blessings waiting to be spotted.

She's thirteen, warm with fever, and sleeping in my bed tonight. Last night, her little brother informed me of Em's odd "hot skin". From annoying lingering headache to scorching temperature within a couple of hours.

Her fierce independence restricts too much nurturing on my part usually. So catering to her has been kind of nice. I'm needed by my rosebud, my dolly dingle, my chick!

There's something sweet in the care giving. It brings to mind all the traits in her that have always made her dad and I smile. How, as a toddler, she would never smile for grown ups who acted silly, she just looked at them like they had problems. I remember a relative at a family reunion who happened to be a psychologist trying to get her to smile when she was just a toddler. Of course, she gave the usual stare and I informed him "She doesn't respond to people when they talk to her in 'baby' talk." He replied that she wasn't responding because I was teaching her not to by saying she wouldn't respond. (Yeah, it didn't really make much sense then either.) I just left him to his ambitious efforts. Of course, he never got the smile. She could spot the real and the artificial back then and she's always wanted the real.

She had the nose of a hound from early on. Never could I get away with a treat hidden in my mouth. Little Em would always walk right up to me, tilt that little head up at nearly a 90 degree angle, ask what I had, and expect me to share.

If she could have wiped the color pink off the face of the earth, I think she would have. Never liked lace, ribbons, bows, or fluffy dresses. Her granny once bought her a dress from Dollywood and I made her wear it to church just one time. She has never forgotten that.

We never had to invest in dolls or barbies just stuffed animals and lots of them. She has quite the menagerie of them still. She really got attached to stuffed animals. When eating at a Cracker Barrel once, she spotted a wolf beanie buddie named Nanook and wanted him desperately. I wanted to get him for her, but felt it was a good time to teach the lesson that we can't always have what we want. Her tears that night caused me to spend the next two years searching for Nanook until I finally spotted him on EBay and bought him for Christmas. After that I had a hard time saying no to stuffed animals.

She gets attached to animals sometimes to people too, but mostly animals. Right now, she's attached to a horse named Tex who she insists is hers even though we have no fenced field for him and cannot purchase him for her. But I actually believe she will end up with him. She has learned to rely on One who can provide more for her than her dad and I. I like that.

She's gone through some challenging years. Challenging for her and me. Years that had me seeking counsel and pulling out hair. The hair's growing back and the counsel grew my character first. Now I look back and I'm thankful for her challenges. Anything that helps grow her mama into what He calls her to be is a good thing.

There are a couple of things that I'm extra thankful for. Like her thick skin. She's never been sensitive. I think she might mourn for about two minutes if insulted outright, but usually she just assumes someone's joking and joins in. She wants friends and loves people, but she will not change herself for them. The other thing is that she does things I was too fearful to do. Some things that I'm still to fearful to do. Like singing in front of people or even just going out of her way to talk to new people.

I really like this girl, this bewildering creature we call Em who loves horses, dogs, and people especially some very special ones at church. This girl who has always wanted a big sister has found herself playing that exact role to another tiny girl who she was hesitant to invite home from the hospital yet now when we sneak a peek around the corner into the living room, we see big sister dancing with the little sister. And I smile because I know she is being the big sister that she always wanted.

Yes, her sick with fever makes me think about all this. Snapshots of her. Life is full of pictures never taken. Images captured in my mind and held sweetly in my heart.

Luke 2:19--"But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart."