I'm not actually referring to the slithering creature that has found a safe haven in our home. This time I'm talking about the woman my husband lives with...me.
Yesterday, I sat across the desk from someone who said they admired me because of the choices I've made. Aaaahhhhhhh, crushing blow...some people have no mercy! Ever have that happen...people saying kind words lifting you up when unfortunately you know too well the individual they are speaking of?
People say kind things sometimes--as difficult as it may be to swallow them when they are about you. I've been guilty of saying some kind words to people myself! I say them because there are people whose very existence I have benefited from because they minister to my children or they have shown love to me in one form or another. So I dare to say those sweet words to them...knowing, however, even as I say them how humbling it can be just to hear kind words about oneself because not one of us is actually good and we know it...hopefully. (I suppose it's those who really think those adjectives pertain to them that we should be worried about.)
So as the kind words came across the desk yesterday, there came another dose of humility. But not as great a dose as flooded me later that night when sitting on the couch with sweetman. We were discussing--okay, arguing--about some schooling issues...sore subject for me lately. I ended the conversation by pointing out some short comings on his part. Why is it when we say what we are really itching to say sometimes it feels so bad afterwards? So in one day I go from someone saying extremely kind words about me to me doing something to prove I'm not worthy of them. I really already knew I wasn't worthy of them...why did I have to prove it again?
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