stepping back for victory

Jeremiah 8:22--"Is there no balm in Gilead; is there no physician there? why then is not the health of the daughter of my people recovered?"


You are always my Father
but sometimes I change roles

Sometimes I'm your little girl
who clings to You desperately to stay secure

Sometimes I'm Your woman
who confidently oversees a handful of little ones You've given me

Sometimes I'm Your prodigal
who, after seeking my own way, crawls back to You, hoping for a tiny morsel of anything

Sometimes I am even Your soldier
fearless and bold, willing to speak Your truth

But today I admit I am Your baby, Your toddler
ready to take my toys and go home

I feel like I've been infected with a virus of bad attitudes
I see how it starts:
One thing happens to one person and in just a moment that person chooses to hold on to anger or hurt
and the virus infects them
when others come around they are exposed
they have a choice as to whether they will allow this infection or not
some may choose to reject it, but others...

Sometimes it's just easier to allow the infection instead of resisting it

The problem is the power of the virus grows as the infections multiply
If it was smothered and refused at first, it could not spread
But as it is accepted by a few it grows stronger and even harder to resist by others

This is where I am, exposed by many carriers, infected by my own choice, virus coursing through my life lines, immune system weakened by misplaced time and possibly misplaced service
Feeling the effects of grumblings, bad attitudes, held anger
Feeling myself ready to pass it to others

I need Your antibiotic (again)

So today, this disgruntled child of Yours cancels everything just to be with You, the One who loves me most,
and the ones You gave me who I love so

Time for Your healing words to spread through the fibers of me to destroy the disease that would devour my spirit and my effectiveness for You

You are so patient with Your children, more patient than I am
Correct the infection in me today and make me more like You
Make me resistant to more infection and make me to spread Your healing balm
so next time I will be ready to be a soothing ointment for others, an instrument of Your peace

This time I didn't do so well

Jeremiah 46:11--"Go up into Gilead, and take balm,..."