Wednesday, April 14, 2010

fifty years

I have wondered what thoughts to share on their special day. I'm unqualified to speak about the blissful state of marriage as I'm still in the midst of times when marriage is difficult. Marriage is hard...two becoming one can feel quite unnatural. I've found myself questioning God at one time or another wondering what was He thinking? But I suppose He always asks us to do things that go against our nature maybe because He knows how hopeless we humans are and how desperately we need a better way to keep us out of trouble. But while I cannot talk about the state of marriage in general, I can talk about what their marriage has meant to us. Sometimes being one of the two who became one it's difficult to see the impact of your union on those around you. But their commitment to each other has affected us.



Mind you, they are definitely two very different individuals. Granny, as we call her, is much more of a social bug as our Emily will testify to. Any time Em runs errands with Granny, she knows it will take quite a while because Granny knows most of the people in the stores and this means a lot of stopping to talk. Granny is also the spoiler of the grand kids. There is no denying this! If a little one wants candy, they usually get it if they're at Granny's. Want to watch a t.v. show?--Go to Granny's! But how could a mom be upset with this? For when they head over to her house, they are carefree, going to another safe haven. What a relief for me! In a world where there are many things to worry about harming my kids, the greatest concern I have with them going to Granny's is that they could get a cavity or watch a few episodes of Bonanza. She provides a safe place for these kids so I can enjoy a little quiet.

Papa is certainly no social bug, but when he does talk we all listen, because he tells about earlier years...moonshining years. Today we will play music like "White Lightning" by George Jones and "Revenooer Man" by Alan Jackson and smile, knowing this is Papa's history and we love to hear about it. But Papa does not spoil children. He has a tough side as any trespasser can tell you after they've met up with him with a rifle in his hand. But that toughness is lost when little Lily leans in to hug him goodbye because after the hug she always leans in again for her kiss--only she expects him to give one to her...her innocent expectation forcing tenderness from him. Papa is just plain no nonsense and hardworking following the tradition of his ancestors who settled in this county about one hundred and fifty years ago when there was nothing here. His hard work provides me with one of my favorite things-a garden. He does all of the hard work year round--preparing the field, planting, fertilizing, watering, and then lets me have the fun part...the harvest.

As different as they are, it is their oneness that we benefit from most. I tried to imagine what it would be like if they were not together and that's when I realized the enormous impact their union has had on us. Who can understand the mystery of marriage? I can't. I'm convinced I would love Papa as dearly if it were just him and I'm certain I would love Granny the same if it were just her, but if they were not "the two of them as one" something would be missing. They are both great on their own, but as a unit they are different. Marriage adds a whole new dimension. Two people individually are great, but two people together add a whole new dynamic, something special because the goodness of them both is now multiplied and there are new facets to the combining of their personalities. We are so thankful that they became one so many years ago as we have all been blessed by that.

2 comments:

  1. After nearly 39 years, marriage is still a mystery to me too Angel. Darrel and I are different as day is to night and yet, God has helped us to learn and grow from one another in our individualities.
    Thanks for your sweet stories about your family. God has been so good to us all and has taught us much through our parents and grandparents. We are blessed.

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  2. What a great testimony, Angel. Marriage is so easy and so hard, if that makes any sense:) how blessed your family is to have grandparents involved in the lives of your children, because it's a heartache when they aren't ~Deb

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