Saturday, December 12, 2009

the blessings of hardships

I can't help but cringe a little at this time of the year. My ears are bombarded with pleas to give...unwrapped toys, gifts valued at a certain amount, money to help purchase gifts for those without. Am I wrong in my gut feeling here that we tend to try to soothe the hurts and emptiness of the needy with things?

We are among those who do not have quite as much cash flow as before. We have spread the word to extended family that we can't quite afford all those gifts we once gave, much to the relief of the extended family (because they can't either). So this year we've agreed to make goodies for each other's families. It's something simple, but it also means we're putting much thought into something special for their particular tastes. No smacking a credit card on a counter so there's something wrapped and under the tree for each one. Not this year, the lack of funds provides us with a rare treat...relief of the pressure to give the perfect manufactured gift and instead the time we will enjoy baking and cooking together while we taste test and package the perfect treats that we know are "his" or "her" favorite.

Our gift giving for our little ones looks a little different this year too. No expensive electronics, or latest gadgets, no lists. I've never enjoyed the idea of a list anyway. When I was younger, a gift meant something given because someone was thinking about you not something someone gave because you told them what you wanted. Yet somewhere along the way even I gave in to the gift list and I allowed our kids to give me one...before. Before this blessed year came along, that is. This year in which we are blessed with an opportunity that has before been hidden by an abundance of "things". It is a great place to be...the place of having little. Why do we try to mess that up for people by assuming the way to show them love is by bombarding them with material possessions. Material possessions aren't great conduits for love, but having to be creative in expressing love provides just that.

We drew names amongst the seven immediate family members this year. Having a handful of kids, we didn't want them to all be trying to buy for seven different people so drawing one name seemed a good solution. The results made me even more thankful for hard times. Everyone looked to see who they received, only Lily, our little wildflower, received her own name so I quickly exchanged with her. Oldest boy got youngest boy; youngest boy got mom; mom got the wildflower; wildflower got dad; dad got oldest boy. But wait...there were two more. Amazing the two that were left. Most of the time in this simple family there is peace, but when there isn't, probably 80% of those times, there are two little people in this family dealing with friction of such magnitude that I search for opportunities for them to show love to one another...they were the only two who drew each others names. Blessings sometimes are hiding out in the hardships if we just allow the hardships to happen instead of always trying to prevent them for people.

Philippians 4:11--"...for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content."

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